Ten Benefits of Staying Married

This is a book about marriage, but it’s not the kind of “how to make your marriage better” book that we have come to expect. This is a book about how our intimate relationships can make us better.

1. BETTER QUALITY OF LIFE: Being married is associated with:
• better physical and mental health
• diminished stress
• fewer negative life events

2. KNOW THYSELF: Being part of a long-lasting relationship is the best way to get to know ourselves better.

3. MEMORY KEEPING: Sharing a history with someone we love helps us to remember.

4. AGE CREATIVELY: An intimate relationship can make the time of growing older one of expanding, rather than diminishing, possibility.

5. BE MORE GENEROUS: Our intimate relationships can help us to grow into our best, and least self-centered, selves.

6. ACCEPT YOURSELF: Lasting intimacy can teach us to appreciate, rather than deny, our human fallibility.           

7. KEEP GROWING: Intimate partners can help each other to achieve the relentless renegotiation of self that is the hallmark of vitality, change and growth.

8. FREEDOM THROUGH LIMITATION: The most direct path to freedom lies in remaining true to our commitments. 

9. DEEP LOVE: Love can get better over time, and really loving someone is the most important thing we do in our lives

10. REAP THE REWARDS OF YOUR EMOTIONAL INVESTMENT: There is a mother lode of untapped possibility in the lives that we already have. Our intimate relationships can change us. They can cause us to grow. There is something missing if they don’t.